fashion and shopping pd daily

the ivy top

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When Scha Alyahya and our team designed this top, we just sighed. It turned out everything we wanted it to be, dreamy and soft, probably the most feminine piece in our collaboration collection. Scha’s request was for her collection to be affordable without compromising quality. It was a tall order, but we did it in the end! I’m so happy almost all pieces are sold out and now we are left with odd sizes here and there, so try your luck in case we have your size!

This organza top is called Ivy, comes in black and white, and retails at only RM 159.

Wearing Mangosteen satin silk scarf from dUCk, watch from Daniel Wellington and top from Scha Alyahya for FV, all via FashionValet.

being a mrs love loved ones working girl

dean’s 27th birthday

Dean’s birthday this year was special because there was a lot of “firsts” involved. First birthday in the new office, first birthday as a dad of two and some other firsts that I’d rather keep private. But basically, I was scratching my head on how to make it a memorable one for my dearest husband.

As all the other pranks I love to pull on Dean, Toots and Asma’, the ideas just come flooding at the last minute. He had his Man Of The Year award from AugustMan last year, and I remember the suave picture that he’s so shy about. When you tell me you’re shy about something, naturally I will blow it up real big for everyone to see. Teehee. So I decided I wanted to stick that picture all over FV to tell the world it was his birthday!

I played it cool, careful not to let any hint that anything’s happening as we drove together to work that morning. But I was frantically communicating with the FV team with updates like “Are you guys ready? I can’t stall him any longer, he’s getting suspicious!” or “Ok, I faked a stomachache and am now sitting on the toilet bowl staring at the wall. Hurry up!”

As soon as he arrived, everyone shouted “SURPRISE!!!!!” and judging from Dean’s face, I knew he had no idea at all.

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Literally everywhere, guys. Like people who didn’t know about us started googling us as they passed our building. It really was cheap advertising. Dean was so embarrassed hehe. But I also know that he felt really touched, to see all of the FV team members there celebrating him – they are his family too, so it meant the world to him that everyone was showing him love.

Like naughty kids, we skipped work for a couple of hours to watch a movie, Fast & Furious 7. Oh by “we”, I mean the whole FV team.

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Our popcorn and hot dog orders were craycray.

At night, we had our usual family dinner with everyone.

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Mariam was clearly the most excited one among us.

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She totally slept through the whole thing, guys.

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Dean told me it was an awesome birthday and that meant the world to me. Seeing my husband happy and surrounded by people he loves – his family, his colleagues, his best friends and most of all, his two children – I can’t help but feel the contentment shining through his eyes.

I love you, Dean. You are an amazing man and you deserve all kinds of happiness in this world and the hereafter, especially. I pray for this everyday for you. Happy belated 27th birthday, my love. To many many many more birthdays together.

being a mom being pregnant sports and gym

getting back in shape

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My shoe wardrobe; where sneakers go to die.

Losing the pregnancy weight is a tough thing, even for me. You probably can’t see it with my loose clothes nowadays haha, but I still have my flabs here and there from the pregnancy. I’m not back at my pre-pregnancy weight yet and everyday I curse the weighing scale for being irritating. “You on your period or what, you? Pissing people off all the time…” I’ve scolded it before. I’ve got 2 more kilos to go and I’m telling you the last 2 kilos are just the hardest!

I can’t control my food so much because I’m breastfeeding and if I do, I won’t produce enough milk for Mariam.

Mom issues: need to get back into shape post-pregnancy, can’t diet because still breastfeeding, can’t exercise because WHEN ON EARTH WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO GO TO THE GYM IN BETWEEN WORK AND GETTING GROCERY AND RUNNING AROUND AFTER DANIEL AND BREASTFEEDING MARIAM AND GETTING A SHOWER FOR MYSELF, FOR GOD’S SAKE.

Ok I’ve calmed down. Phewwww so good to get that out. Sorry I pressed you too hard, keyboard.

Anyway, by hook or by crook, I need to get in shape again… unfortunately for breastfeeding moms, exercise is non-negotiable since diet is not an option. Have to find time, after work, or 6 am with eyes closed at the gym. Die die must do!

Am considering my options now:

1) Gym – definitely will need a personal trainer since I have no self-discipline whatsoever. But the gym bores me to my bones and I’m the type of person who jumps for joy when my previous trainers said they can’t make it to today’s session.

2) Yoga – I’m not a big yoga person, but I heard it’s pretty slow, more for strengthening and not that good to lose flabs? Advice?

3) Body tone – the vibrating thing. My only worry is that it shakes your whole body so surely it’s not good for your insides, no? Advice?

4) Kickboxing – the last time I went for kickboxing, the boxing thingy didn’t even move when I kicked it. I was pretty embarrassed, I never went for a second class. If I choose this, I will have to choose a different kickboxing place where no prior judgments have been made of me. Haha.

Ok. So what would you guys choose to keep in shape?

fashion and shopping my handbag series pd daily

bag your heritage

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I’ve been obsessed with sling bags recently, and this one from FV caught my eye. Sakura Malaysia just released a whole collection of embossed bags with heritage elements, of course I would be among the first to support such cause!

Wearing Mixed Crepe scarf from dUCktop from Scha Alyahya for FV and bag from Sakura Malaysia, via FashionValet.

being a mom being a mrs

dainty vs not dainty

Mariam is one of the noisiest babies I know. I imagine her to be all dainty and elegant, but nooooo. She grunts in her sleep, she gulps milk down with actual chomp chomp chomp sound, and when she stretches after waking up, fuhhh ain’t nothing graceful about that girl! Haha.

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I keep telling Dean, “Oooohh I can’t wait for her to wear this dress… and that dress… and these pink shoes… bla bla pink here pink there bla bla.”

And Dean’s reply, “How do you know she won’t be a tomboy?”

“How can she be?! I’ll be there to make sure she likes Barbie dolls and long hair and whatnot.”

“Mmm-hmmm, that I won’t doubt,” Dean smiles.

“She’s going to be super elegant, and beloved in people’s eyes,” and off I go daydreaming of the day she and I go shopping together.

But Dean, as the father, is probably picturing the headache daughters give fathers; the boys, the shopping, the make up, and the OMG SHUT UP NO YOU SHUT UP kind of friends. He is trying hard to keep Mariam as un-dainty as possible.

He looks at Mariam who btw is innocently lying down on the bed.

“Mariam, look, a dinosaur,” Dean holds up on of Daniel’s toys. “Roarrrrr!”

“Did you just Roarrrr our dainty daughter?” I was not impressed.

“Yeah…. Mariam, you like dinosaurs right? Roarrrrr. Roarrrr. Yuck Barbie, yuck.”

I rolled my eyes.

All of a sudden, Mariam… embarrassingly farts loudly.

“Mariam, whoa!” I was shocked, “Mariam, that was not graceful.”

Dean on the other hand, grinned from ear to ear, “Mariam, do it again. Fart some more. Boys love that.”

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Dean is totally crushing my dreams here, guys.

fashion and shopping pd daily working girl

back and ready

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Back at work and I’m lovinggggg it!!! I miss the workplace, I miss my colleagues and I miss the stress.

Wearing scarf from dUCk and jacket and pants from aere (absolutely love the texture and they come in 3 colours from XS to XL), all from FashionValet

being a mom being pregnant

mariam’s labour story: a hormonal start

Ok so it’s time to blog about Mariam’s delivery before I have a third child. Haha.

(You can read about Daniel’s delivery here – Part 1, Part 2, Part 3)

My labour this second time around was so similar to Daniel. I was induced in the middle of the night, and I gave birth at 2.30pm. Same for both Daniel and Mariam! And I also had to be induced twice, just like with Daniel, because my cervix did not open with the first induction. Seriously man… my cervix is so stubborn! But not all were the same. This time, I was more drugged, more hormonal and I was crying a lot.

So this is how it went:

11pm:

Check in to “my hotel room”, unpacked while humming some happy song (no such humming happy songs happened when contractions started to come!), la la la, had so much fun with Dean laughing and stuff, took some flatlays and other pics for instagram. You know, priorities.

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My last outfit as a pregnant woman.

Cardigan and skants from FV BASICS (comes in 3 colours, from XS to XL). 

Midnight:

Asma’ arrived to accompany me so Dean went out to get KFC for all of us. Toots wanted to come too but the whole month her work project took over her life, like seriously I felt bad for her! Ok back to my KFC. The fried chicken was super awesome, I had TWO iced milo’s (go big or go home…) but the lady forgot the extra gravy for my whipped potato. I was yakking on that for minutes when the nurse interrupted me.

“Hi Madam, are you ready for the butt medicine?” while holding a tray of that scary syringe with the liquid. She didn’t actually say butt medicine, but who cares what the scientific name is. Medicine, up your butt = butt medicine.

No need to explain, you know what happens.

My husband still loves me despite it all, thank God.

1 am: 

“Hi Madam, are you ready for your induction?”

I mean seriously, she’s so polite but I was so annoyed with her cheerful questions. No one’s ready for pain, ok!?!! Stop asking and just tell me it’s time.

“Yes thank you,” I said dryly as I spread my legs reluctantly. She inserted the pill and monitored me with that CTG scan thingy the whole night.

Bismillah…

2 am:

Dean was asleep on the cramped sofa next to me, and I smiled looking at him. It might have been the drugs but I wanted to go there and kiss him thinking how lucky I am to have such a supportive and loving husband. (A few hours later, I hated him and told him all this was his fault.)

Daniel slept with his grandma and she sent us a photo of him sleeping. I looked at it again. I cried because I really missed him and he looked so sad that I just wanted to tell him Mommy loves him. I just wanted to cuddle him at that time and I needed him in my arms. I need him, I told Dean earlier before he slept. And Dean hugged me because I know he felt the same way too.

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My phone beeped with a message from my dad. He was overseas at that time, so I read his earlier messages to me that day.

“All the best to my sweetheart. My prayers are always with you. Daddy is always with you, my brave girl,” he sent with an old picture of him kissing my forehead.

Cried some more.

I read the same Quran that I took with me during Daniel’s delivery. Over and over again, I read the Yasin since I felt that was most comforting at the time.

I went to sleep sending telephatic messages to my cervix.

“Please be open when I wake up, please be open when I wake up.”

6 am:

“WHY IS IT NOT OPEN YET?!! WHY IS IT SO STUBBORN?!” I wailed to Dean after the nurse checked my dilation and it was at 0 cm. She told me another induction pill will be inserted at 8 am. Same story as Daniel’s delivery.

Dean and I prayed Subuh together. That was my last prayer as a pregnant woman. The doa was extra long, I cried asking God to forgive my sins and that if anything happened to me, please have mercy on me and protect me from his Hellfire. I was crying and crying. I mean, you really think about God when you’re helpless and you realise you can’t control what happens. You realise how small you are and you will beg Him to grant you mercy.

8 am:

Doctor came to check me. Inserted another induction pill inside me.

9 am: 

I was dancing around the hospital bed, around the toilet, around the living room, you name it!

This time, the pain was more than Daniel’s. The contractions had come and I was tugging on Dean for comfort.

“Tulah…. kena selalu ingat jangan lawan your mother. Mothers go through a lot of pain giving birth,” my mom says casually from the couch while chomping on the bread she brought for me.

I gave her an annoyed stare while bending down in pain.

THIS IS NOT THE TIME, MOTHER!

10 am:

I was so sure I was at least 6 cm by then. I mean, the pain… fuh.

Nurse came to check dilation.

I was at 1 cm.

I’m pretty sure they wanted to laugh at me, but I didn’t care.

“Please Nurse, can I have the epidural now?”

And so they wheeled me into the labour ward.

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Kids are awake. I have to go! But see, already so much crying in the beginning of my labour. Wait till I tell you about the screaming woman in the labour room….