dear god

June 15, 2009

A text from my dad read, “Let me know your itinerary for this month. If you don’t have anything to do, come back.”

That must’ve been really hard for him to say.

A few years ago, that text would’ve been, “What are you doing there wasting your time and my money? Come back now.


I explained that all my friends were staying back for their graduations and that we were all spending time together until our families come next month. I added that there was plenty to do here and my programme is pretty packed with outings and trips, but also had to add that they were going to be day trips, so he needn’t worry.

He replied, “OK.”

I’m almost shocked by his gradual acceptance of me turning into an adult, and letting me flap my wings a little bit.

As a child, I have always been his little princess. If he was home, I had better be home or else. If he went out, that’s when I took the opportunity to go out and make secret deals with my mom not to tell him. Of course, half an hour later, I would be silence-ing a call from him, and suffering the consequences of that when I get home.

I hated being overprotected. I would rebel and do stupid things just to prove a point, a point I myself wasn’t sure of. There are lots of things I regretted doing as a child, and if I could turn back time, I would really listen to my parents.

They know best, as cliche as that is.

As a newly-turned adult now, I find myself understanding my parents better. I still check in and out with my parents everyday on my whereabouts and that I’m still alive, but the difference is that now, I do it because I genuinely want to. Not because I’m forced to.

We tend to think about ourselves and focus on our own happiness which we tend to associate with freedom from our parent’s reins. But think about them for a second, and put yourself in their shoes. It must be really difficult raising and loving your child, every second of the day worrying about their safety and working your butts off to provide food and shelter (and the occasional Chanel bags) for them.

Giving birth deserves its own medal, but all those sleepless nights because the baby is crying is also worthy of an award. Trust me, I’ve seen it first hand with my sister and her kids, and it almost put me off having kids. I mean, they’re cute and all, but when they’re naughty it’s really frustrating.

All the sacrifices you make, only to find that one day, puberty will hit and your child will turn into some hormonal monster, more interested in smoking, drugs and sex. And then, adulthood comes and the last thing your child wants to do is to be with you.

It must be really disappointing being parents, I almost don’t see the point of it. Haha

I really don’t think parents are being appreciated enough these days, and that has got to change.

L1050090My Tiffany locket of my parents

Dear God,

I love my parents so much, and everytime I do something they wouldn’t approve, it kills me inside. My dressing, my lifestyle, my attitude; all the bad things in those are no indication of my parent’s teachings, but are purely my own flaws.

They are amazing parents, who have given my sister and I so much and instilled in us moral values and respect for people that money cannot buy. So please keep them safe and happy.

I have no idea how to start repaying them except by working hard from now on to make them proud, and by praying to You everyday that they will be well taken care of in heaven in the afterlife.

Forgive their sins, and forgive mine too.

Your humble servant.