mommy’s feet
April 22, 2011Mom: You know you get pahala just by looking at me? So you should come and spend time with me.
Me: Why do you think I carry your picture with me everywhere I go? Sometimes when I’m alone, I just take it out and look at you. Then when I’m eating alone in the restaurant, I’d put your picture on the table and pretend I’m eating with you. Sometimes when I walk, I look at the picture while walking, risking my life.
Mom: You joke la like that….I don’t know….
Me: Ok ok kidding!! I love youuuuu.
*sits down and stares at her*
After a minute…..
Mom: Ishhhh I feel suffocated. Can you go away and do work or something? Mommy lemas la you dok pandang je!
Sheeeessshhhhh, what’s a girl gotta do to love her mom around here???
Today I came home and my kakak told me my mom’s upstairs, unwell. Apparently, she vomited 6 or 7 times. I joke with my mom a lot, but I do love her with all my heart and soul!! I dropped everything and ran upstairs. Kissed her all over and she was feeling very warm.
Fever, I thought.
Made her drink and eat medicine, and just lied down next to her, massaging her head.
“A little bit to the right….thank you…”
-____-
“Can you scratch my back also?”
“Yes, Mom.”
“Massage my head like just now. You know…if anything happens to me and I become unconscious, I just want you to constantly play clips of the Quran around me so I can hear. And please ask forgiveness from everyone who knows me. Once I die, make sure you don’t take even a single cent ok, because when someone dies, their asset is frozen. If you take it, it will be haram. It has to be divided the Islamic way first. Give a bulk to charity, please. Please behave yourself when I die, and be a good girl. I guess you can have my handbags, but divide equally with your sister. Please don’t argue with your sister. Take good care of Daddy when I’m gone ok?”
“Ok, ok Mom, I massage your head, I massage your head.”
This was too deep for me to swallow. I know what she’s saying is amanah for me to take, but I didn’t want to hear all this! I was actually scared. For a second, I thought about what I’d do if my mom wasn’t here anymore. I would die inside!
After she dozed off, I went to get ready for bedtime in my room. I kept coming into her room to see if she was ok.
She was playing Bejeweled on the iPod.
She’s totally fine! Pffttt
But of course, it made me realise how much my mom means to me. I know we all know this, but it’s good to be reminded that heaven is under our mom’s feet. I remember playing with my mom’s feet when I was younger, and I asked her “Er Mommm….why does heaven look like THAT?” examining her dry skin.
She’s sleeping now next to me while I write this. And I just feel so close to her right now. I really don’t know what I’d do without her. God, I love my mom.
For readers who have lost their moms, I’m deeply sorry and I admire those I know who are so strong! Never stop making doa for them, and may God bless their souls, Insyaallah.
Just a reminder for us all; Be good to our moms.
π Love this. Love my mom too!
I can feel you.At this age,the’re start to talk about this wasiat-thingy.Become afraid when think of they will leave us. What can we do now,spend more time w/them and appreciate our mum while they’re still around π
:'( i love this entry and ‘the grandest love of all’ the most! good job vivy! π
I agree with Isma. I hate it when my mom starts talking about all this wasiat, changing names on the property, and all that. It makes me sad. Moms are supposed to be around forever!
almost cry! T_T
i can’t live without my mak too even now i’m married,whenever i’ve problmes n share it with her i know that she’s the best pain killer i ever had
uhuks.
this is deep.
me love my mak also.
can’t imagine if she won’t be around.
huhuhu
thanks v for posting this..it means a lot..nway, playing Bejeweled after that? =)She’s so cool. and a great mum too because she raised you and your sister well..
Nway, the question when you’re much younger, why heaven looks like that? Gosh, that’s soo funny v..haha=)i wonder how your mum would answer that..hihi..hope your mummy is doing fine now..have a great weekend=)
what a coincidence! i tweeted about this just now… but from my point of view, as a mom. I am a mom to 3 wonderful children who are more often little monsters than little angels… but they are my babies, my angels nonetheless…
Today, when i sent my eldest son (8 yo) to school, I realized that he is ok with me holding his hands while we walk… of course, the hugging part (PDA hehe) is done reluctantly hehehe *dah besar anak mama* Alhamdulillah, he still holds my hands whenever we walk (of course alternately with his brother – baby sister still can’t walk) but the point is, he is still ok with it…
I have always prepared myself for the day when he decide to not hold my hand anymore, the day he feels he’s too ‘grown up’ to do so and that it’s not cool to do so anymore…
gosh i am a soppy mom hehehe i just pray and hope that my children will always feel proud to be able to walk hand in hand with their mother (and father)…
and of course, i love my mom (and arwah dad) too!
I love this post! Its my biggest fear actually…living in this world without my mom around. Thanks for the reminder, Vivy
Salam –
Vivy, make sure every day you sedekahkan bacaan Al-Fatihah to both your mom and daddy. Boleh sedekahkan even masih ada disisi,lebih2 lagi bila sudah tiada.
Aunty, semoga aunty & uncle dipanjangkan umur utk tengok Vivy kawen dgn Dean,ameen yrb.
M touched!Yupe indeed..appreciate them (parent)while there are still around.Cherish the moment people!
lucky those who still have mum (yup, i’m not one of you…) i luv her so much and always missing her…sob, sob!
so please please please don’t stop loving your mum…ok? π
love the post!
my mom passed away 2 years ago and I couldn’t be by her side during her last breath coz I was in Spain doing my master study that time.
The last time I talk to her was 2 days before she passed away and her last words to me were βMa dah bagi didikan agama yg cukup utk anak2 ma.Pandai2 la pilih yg mana baik & burukβ
Even though it was already 2 years, every time I thought about her…I’ll cry :((
*sorry for the long comments, I got a bit carried away by this post*
sobsob.i miss my mother.Ok wanna shoot to Seremban after office hrs to see my mama π
vivy…
so touching la post ini..
mengalir air mataku…
last month i watched tv9 channel while preparing bfast with mom…
the ustaz was talking about wasiat
suddenly mom said to me
‘next year sebelum mak pergi haji, i will write a will. so, along as the eldest please take care of them. pakat2 dengan adik beradik.’
i was like….mom, why r u saying tht???
This hits me with a bang. Thank you for reminding all of us (namely me) to be nice to our moms. I must say, my mom and I are not in good terms most of the time. We can never have a conversation without having an argument in between. The talk is very petty really, but I tend to snap a lot whenever she said something. Maybe because ever since I was young, she never wants to listen to my thoughts, always disapprove on my interests and hobbies. In other words, everything I do, is always not right to her. And that happens until now. She wants me to share everything with her, even the smallest things. Being a daughter that I am, I did. But when I told her bout it (any story that matter), there must be something that is always not right. I yearn to have a good mother-daughter relationship but I guess I have to accept things the way they are.
Anyway, thank you for this enlightening post Vivy. Feed backs, comments and even solutions on my dilemma are very much welcome from everyone. I am all ears.
Awh this made me cry! Gotta admit, lately I’ve been wondering what life without my parents would be like and that makes me burst into tears at times. It’s a scary thought kan? But I guess it’s also made me realise I should cherish every moment with them. And then suddenly all those moments where my parents would just yap away with their endless advice doesnt seem so annoying to endure anymore. I guess we should never take our parents for granted cos they’re humans too and they’ll one day be returning to Allah before we know it. Ok now i feel sad again. haha. but anyways great post!
this entry makes me cry T_T . hey vivy your blog entries are supposed to make me laugh.
M touched! Lost my mom 8 years ago. Yup she taught me everything except she forgot to teach me is how to live without her! I do miss her soooo much!!! *sob..sob*
so tell our loved ones how much we love them, everyday! =)
I used to have the same problem with the post num 19. I was never in a good terms with my mom because she was so strict (back then) and would pinch me (til it turn blue black) when I misbehave(run around with my cousins at kampung). Then, when I grew older(teen) I became more and more distant with her but everything change when i further my studies. We talk on the phone more often and do a lot of gossip. I guess when you’re far away then you’ll cherish the person more. I love my mommy =)
I am so happy to read this kind of post. Weird? not because of the sickness things (I hope your mum will sembuh very soon) and etc.. but bcoz you are showing and making other people appreciate the one and only gift that cannot be replaced, MOTHER! I wrote something like this (appreciating mother) on my blog last 2 weeks if im not mistaken. http://thethicktalk.blogspot.com/2011/04/bilakah-kali-terakhir-anda-memeluk-erat.html
But of coz my writing can only spread to a very small number of readers. Since you have a huge number of readers for every single day, i hope many people will now open their eyes and appreciate their mother’s more.
*Heart* Mak
You made me cry.. My Mak is now alone w/o her husband (my Abah) who passed away because of cancer. And to think about our mother especially of losing them, that’s so unbearable..
By the way, that’s definitely a very nice post.
vivi darling..sure u gonna be a superb mum juz like ur mum, Allah bless u n yr mum :-))
thank u so much V, for this post…
i missed my mom, everyday…
wish she is still around… =(
Al-Fatihah for her… for everyone that has gone and for all of us..may Allah bless us with all His Love….
one of the most genuine writing i ever read, its raw, insightful and honest.
Like most moms with children busy with their career, your mom needs your love and attention too.Make sure you keep aside a time for her and your dad.I remember reading somewhere a mother said I waited 7 years for you to return home from your studies abroad only to lose you again (I think the child was migrating, having married someone foreign).
I also think you work too hard, VV.The body ain’t a machine.Make sure you have enough rest.Hugs.
I know how you feel. I’m an only child and my mother is a single mother. As a single child, I keep thinking about this. How am I going to survive?? Growing up a lil bit day by day taught me to learn to appreciate my mom and be with her most of the time cuz I don’t know how long I can still see her in front of me.
tq for making me cry… sobsobs… i miss my late mom… i miss her hands.. miss her smile… miss when she hugs me.. miss when she massage my head when i got migrain… miss her homecooked meal… and i really hate myself as i got my cik P on the day she passed away…