still a newlywed
September 17, 2012 • 31 comments • 3151 viewsWe’ve been married for over 2 months now, and every function we go together someone will definitely say “Wahhh pengantin baru!”.
So I asked my sister, “When are you no longer considered a newlywed?”
She answered, “When the henna on your nails finish.”
Did you guys know that?! I never knew there was such thing.
I’m still a newlywed! Haha.
It’s obviously been wonderful. I feel so complete now with a husband and we’re enjoying our time a bit too much, what with the eating all the time syndrome. I really don’t ever want us to stop feeling this way about each other.
But I’m realizing now how it is to be a wife. Laundry has a gazillion steps to it, dust still come every day that I think my vacuum is tired, glass on tables don’t magically shine. And worst of all, if you live on your own, you have no one to call if there’s a cicak or a cockroach. It’s all up to you to scream at them and rip their lives apart. I hate them so much and I feel so geli you have no idea. I wish you could see me in the house, screaming and running across the hallway with my Dyson in hand. One time, I saw a cockroach in the toilet and I screamed and jumped into the bathtub to hide from it. I’ve covered all sorts of possible holes with masking tape, and they still manage to come in somehow. If I could I would tape my whole house!
I need to call the pest control pronto!
Each time it gets killed, I have to keep reminding myself it’s going to heaven, it’s going to heaven, don’t worry…
And I’m used to waking up at a certain time. So I’m finding it hard to wake up, get ready, make-up and hair, snap a PD Daily, make breakfast for Dean, wait for him to eat, then wash the dishes when he’s done. By the time that all happens, I have to do my make-up and hair again because I look like a mess after running around all over the house. Dean, on the other hand, gets ready in a jiffy; wake up, shower, put on shirt and pants, finish story. So in the end, he has to wait for me in the morning before we go to work. I guess there’s only one answer for wives; wake up earlier!
I’m learning one step at a time, and Dean’s been really sweet and understanding that this is all new to me so let’s order Dominos tonight.
One day, Dean was going to a meeting so I sent him to the door. Usually he’d just give me a kiss and go.
But that day, I felt a bit more wife-y, so I held out my hand and took his hand, bent down and kissed it.
“What’s this?” Dean asked, confused.
“I don’t know. I saw it in a Malay film. All the wives do that, so you know… peer pressure.”
“Uhh… ok….”
can always re-apply the henna to keep the “pengantin baru” feeling a bit longer. hehehe ;p
“I don’t know. I saw it in a Malay film. All the wives do that, so you know… peer pressure.”
HAHA.someone really immersed into the movie :p
U r sooo funny Vivy!
Hi
I like the last bit…
You are such a great story teller, I always end up with fluttering heart when I finished reading your life stories..I wish all the happiness for you and Dean 🙂
Hahahaahah… I see that a lot in Malay movies too but can’t bring myself to do it except for on Hari Raya. Are we supposed to do that everyday?!! Maybe we should?! I don’t know…
But I can imagine Deans confused face.
Funny!
“I don’t know. I saw it in a Malay film. All the wives do that, so you know… peer pressure.” HAHA Vivy, why are you so cute?! hehe *Imagining Dean’s confused face.*
HAHAHAHAHAH SO FUNNY
haha the peer pressure thing is funny! 🙂 but what you did, with the salam-cium-tangan thingy is totally ok and sweet. it’s for the love and respect to the husband in malay culture. i think may be the husband will feel more loved (of course confused at first! lol).
Trying to put my baby to sleep & almost wakes her up when I read the last part and laughed. Hahahahahahahahaha ohkay funnayyyy!!!
Hi vivy,
As a wife, everytime salam tangan suami, your dosa akan gugur sebanyak mana your fingers and your husband fingers bersentuhan..so,keep salam him everyday!!!! This is onw of the hadith..It is so easy to be a wife in Islam right..everylitte thing you do with/for your husband, you’ll grant with pahala..even if both husband and wife stare in each other eyes with full of love, the marriage will be bless..
one of the hadith too…
😉
haha, i laughed at the last part. but my ustazah once told me during my school time, we need to salam our husband before went out to ask forgiveness/hope that our day will be blessed without him at home and all because we might not know what will happen outside. *nauzubillah*. eventho it was awkward at first, but since you already did that, might as well make it as routine, k.vivy. hehe.
salute! i am also a working wife but i can’t do allllll the kerja rumah tu alone. and can’t sleep late at night. so husband also need to wake up early to wash dish 😛
hahaha. peer pressure!!! wait till u pregnant – choosing stroller – peer pressure
which school to send : cempaka? garden? skbd? – peer pressure
besday party – peer pressure
which mum’s school car : peer pressure. ahak ahak
before pg keje memang akak akan salam cium tgn hubby 🙂
heheheh so sweet
The salam thingy is awkward at first but after sometime you’ll get use to it. My parents never did it though.
Now, we even train the kids to do it. Personally, it feels like a good thing to start your day:)
Maybe you can do all the breakfast cooking and chores first then make up and hair. That way you don’t have to do it twice 🙂
hahaha..funnylah…nasib baik Dean tak pengsan when u kissed his hand …kekeke
1. Get a part time maid. They can come once a month and do the spring cleaning of the house. Then u x penat sangat. Just buat yg daily chores yg basic2 je.
2. Salam hubby is the easiest but always neglected gestures to get brownie points. Dapat pahala byk tu.
3. Teach Dean to do the laundry. House chores patutnya buat sama2. Dishes, ironing, etc. bila dia buat sama, then dia lagi appreciate more.
i agree with Puteri. Send the non-delicate items to laundrette? our area here got loads of real professional part time, their standard very high too. licin dia bersihkan my 2 tingkat house yang baru lepas renovate. I’m working mother with 3 kids.. no maid.. (faint)
on the monkey thingy… maybe can put grill. Vivy, go to Home Depo next to The Club Damansara tu, they have this ‘invisible’ grill, have a look first, kay..
just remember things can get worse! sometimes kita pembersih gila, tapi jiran pengotor, i once saw a big giant rat when opening guest room’s curtain. Faint.. since then, i NEVER open the door. Reason ? org belakang basuh kain tangan n jemur belakang rumah – not well circulated i suppose. I had even worst : . ehem.. bed bugs in shepherd bush london, and those small rats infestation. it’s the whole building, so we can’t do much. :(.. i know.. i cried, waited for the council’s pest control, then paid myself, then went to B&Q and Dixon to buy itulah, inilah, perangkap itulah, inilah..
good luck vivy. sabar ya..
to halau cicak, u beli spray cicak..can be found at supermarket, i ada beli satu which i found at giant..u spray kat possible entrance of your house, belakang curtain, belakang framed gambar … cicak tak akan masuk rumah once they hidu that spray… most of all mengikut apa yang i baca kat yahoo or google, kita kena buang its food chain.. kalau tak ada bugs or insect in the house, cicak wont come…
Hehehe.inai di jari,like a Sir.*~_~*
V…just to share with u. Everytime we touch jemari our isteri or suami, ia akan membersihkan dosa-dosa kecil kita. So always do that…:-)
Haha funny.
All Ur stories never fail to make me laugh or at least smile..haha..funny n cute..
Salam –
Vivy – beli kat pasar malam…macam pelekat utk halau cicik dgn lipas.
my friend cakap dia buat…it works…tp kena cari di pasar malam ler….
..
I was gonna comment “thats sweet’ and then i read all these comments here…wah so menarik, especially the cicak tips. 😀
Vivy,
as much as it is applaudable that you want to do everything (household chores) as part of your new wifey role, I’m pretty sure Dean can do at least his own dishes in the morning.
Household chores are something that should be done equally. The whole notion that only the wife should so household chores is more to cultural norms than it is Islamic teachings.
As Prophet Muhammad has been recorded as saying that in his spare time he mended his own clothes and help around the house.
But of course, if you’re happy to do so then go ahead. Dean sounds like a great guy anyway!
I know I might sound a bit intrusive by commenting like this, but I just dont want poor Vivy to get tired out.
Aww Vivy, you are already a good wife just by trying to be a good wife! I see so much of the successful-woman-attitude in you, Masya Allah. May Allah bless you always.
I used to be so worried about the ‘wife-ly duties and chores’ bit after marriage because I’m such a stubborn person. You know how Malaysian men have this idea of the perfect wife – always beautiful, agrees to everything he says, prepares meals for him 6 times a day, immediately gets up if he asks for anything, etc etc? Well I was so resistant to the idea of being a submissive wife to such men. Incidentally I got married when I was 24 and left to further my studies abroad for a year – the hubs came with me. Masya Allah.. I was so shamed by my kind, patient and hardworking husband – for a solid year he was househusband and worked all sorts of odd jobs while I was studying. Never once he demanded I do my ‘wifely duties’ or any other intensive house chores because he thought it would meddle with my studying! I believe it is a lesson and a gift from Allah. Here I was expecting my husband to be demanding when he is anything but. I learned that the everyday chores from sharing a home should be done out of love, respect, tolerance and most of all must be ‘adil’. From what little I know of you, it seems you and Dean have that, if nothing else!! Barakallah to you both :))
really2 love that last part.. peer pressure katenye… lol
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