my husband the mayor

June 12, 2015 • 65 comments • 12356 views

Nowadays you will see Dean in a corner furiously typing on his phone, forehead wrinkled and looking very stressed. Aww man, my poor husband, have to work so hard… When I first saw him like that, I would go to the kitchen and make him his favourite drink; hot milo with condensed milk. While I was stirring, I heard him go “Oh man.. How do I get more money… I need more money!”

I looked down at the milo, but my head was already thinking my goshh is work that stressful, is he ok? I stirred faster as my worry level went higher. As I stirred I tried to remember the sales figure for last month for our companies… I thought it was good, I thought we were doing well… but maybe it’s bad to him? We need to work harder, I thought to myself, my right hand still stirring. The milo was spilling on the counter from me stirring too hard. Crap, need tissue to wipe all this. I quickly got the saucer and carefully carried this now lukewarm milo drink to my husband.

“Here you go, baby,” I said softly.

“Thanks, baby,” He answered, not even looking at the drink.

Oh no… is it that bad?! How come I never knew there was a problem?

I should ask him. But I don’t want to stress him out, I thought. No, but I should. We’re in this together. We can fix anything together. I need to help my husband through this.

One hand on his thigh, I softly asked, “Baby, is everything ok? You look very stressed these days. Always on your phone at home, still sitting on this couch in work clothes until late. Sometimes I see you scratching your head….”

He sighed. “Yeah, I’m trying to play this Sim City game, but it keeps getting harder and harder. See?” And he shows me his phone screen. There it was the green landscape with lots of buildings and roads and cars and fake people walking funny. You know, basically A WASTE OF ANY ADULT’S TIME.

I had to sit in silence to process this. Ok, so the whole time I thought we were nearing bankruptcy… I changed the kids’ diapers and put them to sleep without bugging him… I tiptoed around him so I won’t be disturbing him… was because he was busy playing…

He mistook my silence as concern for his stupid city.

“Awww don’t worry baby. My city’s not that bad. Did you know our driver plays this too? He gives me cheat tips for more Sim money,” Dean chuckled as went back to his phone.

I married a child.

A child, guys.

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An example of a very useless conversation.