ok so what now?
June 19, 2017 • 68 comments • 9,327 viewsBoy meets girl. Girl meets boy. They fall in love. Boy is Muslim. Girl is Christian. Boy proposes. Girl says yes. So what now? Where do they go from here?
I wish to protect their identity, but one of the beloved people in my life proposed to his Christian girlfriend recently. Tonight we all hung out and we asked them questions, all of us obviously happy for their engagement but also concerned. Were they serious? What’s the next step? Will she practise Islam? How will he guide her? Do they realise what a big step this is? It’s a hugeeeeee life decision.
I can honestly say once they started opening up, we all became closer. A half hour conversation tonight suddenly turned into a 3-hour one and we learned so much about each other. She asked us questions like what is Ramadhan, how come you only pray Terawih in Ramadhan, why do we pray 5 times a day, how come she has to convert to Islam but he can’t convert to Christianity, do we even know what we read in the Quran since it’s in Arabic and we don’t speak it, how come this how come that. She couldn’t understand some of the things we do, and she opened up and was honest about how she doesn’t know how to accept Islam. And quite honestly, we all started reflecting too because we couldn’t give her spot on answers. We take it for granted that we’ve just been born Muslims and we do it because well… our parents do it!
We asked her questions about Christianity too. She’s a devout one, she goes to church a lot and she speaks of her church with love. She showed us photos of it and how there are 3000 (three thousand!!) people there every session, and how they discuss issues, they sing, they pray, they donate to the church, they eat after and how they would willingly do activities after just to hang out as a community. I have my disagreements on some of the activities she explained, but honestly, it generally sounded really nice and welcoming. She even told us there is this group of “underground Christians” who are actually Muslim but attend church because they enjoy it more. They said Islam is just about rules (can’t do this, can’t do that) and the pressure of being a Muslim was too big for them to shoulder. I personally feel they were taught Islam in the traditional conservative manner, and because they had no one to talk to, we lost them. How dangerous is this for Islam? Us youths aren’t like generations before; we won’t just take cold instructions, we question, we ask, we want to see the logic in everything.
I started thinking about my own religion. Where do we hang out with our community? We all know how important community meetings are; schools have weekly assembly, companies have weekly meetings and town halls. What about religious meets? Sure, the men meet once a week for Friday prayers and listen to the sermons. But where do the women go to learn? Where do the youth go to learn about Islam every week? It has to be our own initiative to join classes here and there of course, and let’s be honest; not many people do it or even know about it. We just pray and fast, and call ourselves good Muslims. My mom’s agama classes are filled with mostly elderly women and I find the talks very preachy and unrelatable to the youth when I attend sometimes. Yes, we have those big fancy annual Islamic conventions once a year, but Christians have big meets three times a week. Their meets are fun and lively, filled with eager and supportive youths, volunteering and helping. Where are all the Muslim youth? Do we really make it interesting for youth to come? Come where, even?
Us Muslim youths are the future of our religion, and if we can’t even explain certain reasons or certain Islamic history, how are we going to drive the Muslim community? With that in mind, we started researching English Islamic classes for her and watched YouTube videos of converts Sheikh Hussain Yee and Imam Suhaib Webb (because she said she wants to start learning about Islam) and we all vowed to go through this journey with her. To support her, and honestly, it was for us too.
Do these thoughts ever cross your mind?
P/S: If I’m wrong about us not having weekly community meets, that is my own ignorance. Please do let me (and everyone here) know the activities and how to spread the word to make Islam more appealing to the youth especially.
And now I start to think too!
Hi Vivy. Love this posting.
Knowledge is to be search. It can be through your oneself or a community. With all these social media , I think our generation are the lucky ones that we can research whatever we want to know. And to learn about something , you need to learn from its origin. Eg : You only can learn the best pasta in the world from Italy because it is its origin. Dua , keep searching and never stop because indeed Allah will help all His servants in searching for the truth. I am sharing a story of one of the Companion of Rasullullah SAW in seraching for the true religion in link below , https://abdurrahman.org/2011/05/27/the-search-for-the-truth-by-a-man-known-as-salman-the-persian/
Selamat berpuasa and selamat hari raya to you and your family ????
Wow, this is deep. You are right, christian kids go to church very early in life and the ingot involved in many volunteering work and a lot of them sing in choirs and build self-confidence but for my kids, i only bring them to mosques during ramadhan and enroll them in some extra classes( expensive too) during school holidays. Thank you for this Vivy, this post is a reallyyyyy an eye opener.
To have a weekly usrah sitting is always nice where sisters/brothers of the same level (stages in life) meet each other to recite a few verses of the Quran and reflect upon them in the language we understand 🙂 We also share insights about each other’s problems and talk about volunteering activities in the weekends. Do let me know if your friend would like to give it a try. Otherwise, I recommend getting her connected to other religiously understanding Muslim reverts which we have so many of, alhamdulillah. Hidayah Center Foundation is goo too 🙂
Vivy I think you spoke millions of voice and for me you are true. Even though there are usrah group but it turns to be preachy at time for some youth. I was blessed to be able to accept those preachy things but still, I do understand how some can’t feel related to it just because it feels too rigid. We were too ignorant since we were born into Islam and while old peoples become too conservative and expect youth to simple oblige – youth are just more curious and some thought that it was just a mean to control them thus they become rebellious. I guess Christian saw that and thus all those lively meetings. It is only natural that way they can “get” the youth and they can channel that spiritual support to youth and then the youth come to accept how wonderful it is. During Rasulullah time everyone was so close to each other – caring and loving. We lost that. Even Friday’s prayer was just a come – hear – go home. We need interconnectedness.
I hope you new family will learn to see beyond this and learn Islam as a religion instead of what Muslims nowaday do. You guys are such a supportive bunch!!
Salam Vivy,
I used to feel the same way too until by Allah’s will I found about this Sheikh who does tafseer, hadith, seerah (Islamic history) and devil’s deception classes for ladies, men, couples AND youth! He’s originally from Algeria but was an Imam in Houston, Texas but moved to Malaysia after the September 11 incident as life was rough in the US. I thank Allah everyday for introducing him to us as his classes are so interesting, positive yet gives you the reality check every time you leave. The problem with the majority of our classes here are that they focus too much on rulings without giving the background on why it came about. And it’s too much on “if you don’t do it, you”ll go to hell!” and less on Allah’s mercy. In fact I remember feeling disinterested to go to talks as I don’t want to “face the reality” but that’s not what Islam is about! Everytime I leave his classes, I feel so motivated in becoming a better Muslim.
You see converts usually embrace and practice Islam better as they learn Islam in and out as supposed to us Muslim who takes it for granted. We need to go back to the basic, Quran and Sunnah. There’s a huge difference with reading Quran translation and learning the tafseer. Tafseer is about knowing why was the ayat in Quran brought down and the context of it. We need to dissect what is it that Allah SWT is telling us. And unfortunately a lot of people take Hadith so very lightly but even our beloved Prophet pbuh said that during the end of time, his Ummah will be split into 73 sects and out of all 72 will go to hell and only one will be successful. Then his companions asked, who are this successful group? And our beloved Prophet pbuh replied the ones who follows me and the rightly guided caliphs after me and hold on to it and beware of innovations (bid’ah) as you will be misguided. The Quran is from our Lord and Sunnah is from our Prophet pbuh.
Even for the youth classes, he would encourage them to ask any type of questions and they can drop it to him anonymously so that they feel safe. I have 3 teenage cousins in International schools and was always quite worried if they would get disinterested in Islam but MashaAllah now they are even more knowledgable than me!
And I know not just this Sheikh but many more who does similar program than this like for example the Nawawi Institute. I do hope you will get to find this kind of community as it is so uplifting!
p/s: I’m only 26 years old so not in the old ladies category ???????? Have a blessed last 10 days of Ramadhan!
Salam Vivy, the answer to your question is actually easy. They might gather 3 times a week but Muslims are supposed to gather 5 times a day in the mosque. But we tend to have a loottt of excuses (including me….) of not going berjamaah every day, leaving only the pakcik-pakcik and makcik-makcik yang dah pencen to go there. When the majority are old, the classes also tend to be a little preachy for the youth.
I start to think about Islam when i start to hijrah from an ordinary person to a better muslimah (yet, i’m still have lots of weaknesses, & still trying to improve myself overtimes).Alhamdulillah i met a right person, my husband, who able to answer every single question even it is a silly question. I still remember i asked him, why the syaitan don’t want to turn to Allah even they knew that everyone who make dosa will be punished in neraka including themselves. And my husband answer me with the dalil taken from Quran.. SubnaAllah. I bless to God for sending me a husband who has knowledge about Quran & Islam..
Hi Vivy, check out Arees University and Training Centre in Kota Damansara and keep a lookout for Sheikh Taariq Appleby. He is a gem!
Salam Vivy,
Para sahabat dulu waktu mula memeluk agama ISLAM, Rasulullah cuma tekankan bab akidah. Di mana waktu itu, tidak turun lagi perintah tentang solat lima waktu sehari, dan ibadah wajib yang lain.
Syukur Alhamdulillah, sahabat Vivy berbesar hati untuk belajar tentang agama, tentang ISLAM, tapi yang mungkin saya boleh kongsi di sini, adalah lebih penting tekankan dahulu berkenaan akidah. Siapa itu Allah, bagaimana untuk mengenali Allah. Siapa itu Rasulullah, dan apa maksud sebenar syahadah.
Supaya beliau tidak rasa ISLAM ni susah. Bukan cuma tentang pakai tudung, perlu puasa, perlu solat.
Rmai yang sangka ISLAM itu rigid sebab kebanyakan kita tiada kejituan AKIDAH ISLAM yang betul, tak pelik sekiranya beliau akan rasa agama lain lebih mudah.
dan sebenarnya banyak NGO/Jemaah yang melakukan usrah/halaqah mingguan. Waktu Rasulullah berdakwah secara rahsia dahulu, Rasulullah sendiri melakukan halaqah. Kebanyakkan jemaah yang handle halaqah ini bilangan satu halaqah ahli nya tidak ramai. sekitar 8-12 . Pengisian disampaikan dalam kelompok yang kecil , lebih mudah diterima banding conference yang beratus yang hadir.
mungkin Vivy, dan sahabat Vivy boleh cuba mencari jemaah yang handle halaqah/usrah supaya ilmu diterima itu jelas, dan berasaskan Al Quran dan sunnah.
Vivy, one of the biggest Muslims NGO in Malaysia called IKRAM has a group for youth. A lot of exciting activities has been conducted to welcome youth. The main objective of IKRAM is to spread the dakwah and to welcome everyone being close to Islam. Everybody is welcome to join IKRAM, they have various groups to meet various segments of society including the kids, students, entrepreneur, profesional, elderly, and also a group for mualaf or non-muslims. Just google – IKRAM.
I think it is because they’re the minority in this country. Like when we’re studying or living overseas, we would eager go to anywhere to meet and socialize with Muslims. Or is it just me? I heard from actress Wardina Safiyyah, there’s something like that in Australia as well.
Hi Vivy, there are Muslim community weekly meeting derived by NGO. However, it sometimes does not really appealing to youth as people that join it seemed to have same basic understanding, they called it usrah. I once apart of the NGO, however started to isolate myself due to the environment that I can’t cope. While most of my friends in the group started to wear tudung labuh and all, I dont really find it comforting to me because I know myself,I want to be better but not with labuhkan tudung just yet. I mean, the feeling is like when you come to you mom’s gathering on islamic thing, that feeling, kinda feel the same. I just feel I don’t belong there anymore. I am still searching a group that really like what you raise here. If you find any, I would love to join 🙂
yes! i’ve heard of IKRAM too. 🙂
i took part in their programs every now and then; they have weekly usrah, monthly meet ups, programs called iris (Ijtima’ Ramadhan IKRAM Selangor) an annual event during the month of ramadhan where they would have talks and iktikaf, latihan kader duat (a program for SPM leavers – here’s a blog of the previous batch do you’ll get an idea of the program) (https://kaderduatmusleh.wordpress.com) and many more.
as for teens they have a specialized support group called Ikramteens, for university students; ikram siswa, for the women they have; wanita ikram, etc.
all these support group are made of people who have been in this field for a long time also with contributions from the youths themselves. im apart of ikram siswa, and they not only organize events for the likes of us but also teach and guide us to organize the events ourselves.
one of the programs we as the youth have organized is face2face street dakwah where we are guided by an officer under Ikram. this program focuses on street dakwah where we approach public and ask them if they have questions on islam and educate them.
in conclusion, if anyone is interested to know more on ikram; you can log onto their facebook page (search : Pertubuhan IKRAM Malaysia )
may Allah bless the ones who are reading this, and you too kak vivy for writing on this; may Allah guide us to the light 🙂
Bismillah. I think its good to focus on her iman (faith) first i.e ensuring she has strong faith in islam before talking to her about solat, etc. And for this purpose, can propose to her to watch Youtube videos of Sheikh Ahmad Deedat insyaAllah.
here’s their facebook page to those who are interested: https://www.facebook.com/ikram.malaysia/
an instagram page dedicated to LKD (latihan kader duat): https://www.instagram.com/traveloglkd8/
Hi vivy we have the community meet every week and every month. And the islamic class for women ( especially for the youth )also we have. Please start your research by typing this ustazah “ustazah fatimah syarha” im the one who involve with the usrah and this community.
We have mizan ( founder by wardina sayyifah) this group usrah will be separate u by the place u r live n location.
Usrah tautan hati conduct by ustazah fatimah syarha.
I hope this can help u to find more and in malaysia we have that kind of gathering but not so many people wanted to know and to join us.
Vivy, you can find several contacts pasted on the bulletin boards i.e., Masjid Bukit Jelutong, Masjid Kota Damansara. You can tell them your preferences and they would be there at your home.
Like us, we told them we wanted Fiqh for Women and Tafseer. Each session is approximately 2 hours. You can always ask other questions (apart from the enrolled classes). Not too rigid and they are super friendly/young ustazah/ustaz.
Hi Vivy,
Do check out Al-Khadeem (http://www.al-khaadem.com.my/) founded by Sheikh Hussein Yee many years back. They are very active in da’wah through regular weekly classes and many more youth-friendly activities. Their door/gate is always open for both Muslims and not-yet Muslims. 🙂
Hi Vivy. This is the first time I’m reading ur blog. An English-medium one that I know of are YoungMuslimsProject (YMP) and Muslims Professional Forum (MPF). Try checking out these two. They’re pretty good. For classes, Al-Maghrib Institute. All the best vivy! May Allah guide you! 🙂
oh hi again. I have another comment. hope u don’t mind. 🙂 I think, if we want to be frankly, perfectly honest you know.. I think it’s unfair to just say, hey you gotta learn about Islam. You know, it’s a marriage. And I think our culture has not been honest about that. I think both has to learn about each others religion and then make a decision about which religion do they want to go forward with for their children, for their family. I would suggest to go to Christianity and Islam classes together. Learn both together. Marriage is a partnership. And truth will prevail. So no worries, you know. The future is important for both the man and woman. Just my thoughts.
I spent some time after SPM to learn about other religion besides Islam. And alhamdullillah I choose Islam. I was born a Muslim. And at 18 I chose Islam again. 🙂
Hello Vivy. There is an organisation called ISMA. I think it’s similar to IKRAM. Or perhaps IKRAM is a body under ISMA. I’m not very sure. But once a fortnight or once a week, I always meet up with a fellow kakak usrah in the institution I study in. Sometimes (most of the time), she brings us food, then we talk about what is happening in the world. Issues regarding misconduct or misconception of Islam. Sometimes, we read al-Quran together. Sometimes, it’s just a meeting to catch up. Perhaps you could give it a go and look at their website; http://www.ismaweb.net They have so many organisations under them, which are for children, doctors, and other organisations.
last year i was looking for usrah, and my friend connected me with IKRAM, and they then connected me with the young usrah leader nearby my place, and since then we tried to meet up every weekend for 1++ hr. we discuss surah, the history, lessons etc. over afternoon tea, and sometimes at nearby cafe. since the usrah leader is a doctor too, we get to ask about health/ illness issues too, and relate it to the religion etc.
Vivy..i have a friend who is graduated from one of the uni in Jordan. He is a freelance preacher@motivator called Brother Iman(not his real name). He collaborates with IM4u.fm in spreading our religion in a modern friendly manner. I think your friend would feel comfortable with him. He’s not always in jubah n what not.u can find him on fb ustaz halim hafiz. #santaitapisampai is his tagline.hope this will help.
i go to the local surau since my neighborhood is kampung. A place for lepak, social with elderly and kuliah maghrib.
The idea to travel more than 35km for usrah baffle me.
My husband is a convert. We went to this association called Al-Khadeem, where Syeikh Hussein Yee is one of the usual speakers. I remember my husband likes him, I guess he finds him calming and not forcing. I’ve been there a few times too, joining my husband. The community is fantastic, a lot of new muslims and they are quite international. So, you get to see islam in a more global way. My advice is, be slow with people, do not tell about islam with the hopes that the person will embrace it, because that tends to make us sound preachy. In fact, tell people about the religion the way it is and why you love it. With a new muslim as a husband, it is a journey for myself as much as it is for my husband. Good luck!
3000 is huge gathering..is she protestant? Or luther?
I’d highly suggest Bayyinah TV founded by Nouman Ali Khan. The qur’an tafseer is just awesome. In this case, learning about imaan well what better way than to start with Al-Fatihah ?
http://stream.bayyinah.tv/watch/quran/al-fatihah/5345675250001/00-fatihah—a-deeper-look
Or another link on youtube about this is on a channel called Quran Weekly.
https://youtu.be/_8I6BZQED7E
All the best with this, may Allah SWT increase ours and your friend’s knowledge & understanding iA 🙂
Me and my sister, we always fight, but when she came back from manchester for summer hols, i was surprised, she became a lot wiser. Curious of what could possibly change this annoying being, I asked. That’s how I got to know about the weekly circle( or they call usrah). I have my skeptic and fear, i can’t read quran well, i like to argue, and I’m so scared that they will judge me, boy… i was wrong.
I learn so many thing about islam and life! We talk about tauheed, history, hadith, ummah, our struggle, we follow up each other progress and ibadah, but most importantly the warmth and bond that we share! Sometime we gather with other circles, who’re as old as my mother, some are young like my little sister, and go hiking, picnic, bowling, zumba, etc. Age doesn’t seem to matter, because at the end of the day we all have the same mission, to improve ourself as a muslim and to share it.
We reach out to others, by conducting program for kids, teens (IKRAM teens), women, revert (hidayah centre), refugee (aqsa sharif, i4syria etc) and disaster victim (icare) . As for me, i do a lot of health outreach program thru IKRAM Health. Especially in rural kampung in sabah, i get to perform my job as a doctor and share islam at the same time!
There’s a lot of islamic NGO out there, trying and working hard to make ummah better, one person at a time. Give Hidayah centre a visit.
Happy last 10th night of ramadan, may Allah shower you and your loved one with forgiveness and blessings.
p/s : Thou nowadays we can search and learn everything just by googling it, but one must have a teacher to have face to face discussion and guide. That’s why Allah sent us prophet, not just the holy scripture.
Assalamualikum Vivy.
I’m sure you now have a list of training centres and gathering places for Islamic classes etc. Personally for me, my life changed after attending my first Diploma in Islamic Studies with Arees University which was then held at Yayasan Taalim, TTDI. It gave me a different perspective about Islam, yes there may be rules and whatnot but everything just makes sense. I couldn’t agree more that we as born muslims, we take for granted of our own religion. So the decision that I made to attend those classes, made me feel like a new muslim myself, Alhamdulillah. When I was done with that, somehow I got included into, say the “correct” whatsapp group and then from then on, you just get all the leads to the right gatherings, classes, lectures, halaqahs and whatnots.
There’s a hadith mentioning that “A person is likely to follow the faith of his friend, so look whom you befriend.” [reported by Abu Dawood & Tirmidhee].
I find it very true because from that point forward, Alhamdulillah, only now that I know mashaAllah, there are so many resources and places for you to go to in seeking the right knowledge. I cannot stress how important the right knowledge is because as I’ve said, we’re born malay muslims and we’ve been brought up with the mixed conception of culture and religion. With the right knowledge, then you’ll be able to answer those questions by your christian friend, inshaAllah.
As mentioned by one of the commentors above, Al-Khadeem, it is definitely a great place for non-muslims to learn about Islam. It provides you the platform to see that Islam is not Malay, Islam is not for the poor only, and Islam is more than just rules.
You see, at the end of the day, it all boils down to your nawaitu, niyah or intention. If you intend to find good things in this life and the hereafter, to seek the right knowledge, to learn more about Islam, Allah SWT will show you the right path. If you don’t have the slightest intention in doing so, it would of course be difficult to find those places, people or resources.
I’m still learning myself, and I’ve got a long way to go, but Alhamdulillah, had I not decide on pursuing my Diploma with Arees, I may not be where I am today.
Oh btw, I’m 27. So yes, those classes that I attended aren’t just for the elders. Hehe.
Also, why don’t you ask her to check out “Your Bro Taufiq”‘s recent project on the voice of reverts. Maybe she can get a little bit of an insight from those videos.
I grew up attending sek agama ever since I was 6 until I’ve completed my darjah khas, Alhamdulillah. Still, I did not consider myself ‘religious’, even now after years, it’s surprising how much I actually dont know about my own religion (rules etc) and I find myself learning about new things now and then through different mediums.
Personally, religion is all about the heart. And the heart is like a door, for it opens when you knock. And for those who seek for the truth, they shall be given, for Allah is with them (al-Baqarah 2:153).
My mom is also a revert and her strongest backbone has always been my dad. All the best to your beloved and his girlfriend, semoga dipermudahkan segala urusan.
As salamualaikum Vivy!
Al Khadeem conducts daily classes. Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday classes are in English.
I really enjoy attending the classes there cause.. it just makes sense. the way sheikh hussein answers the questions (based on Quran and Sunnah which is the correct way). Also, i really enjoy his approach to everyone and Islam.
Hope that helps!
I agree with some of the comment esp, we act have a 5 meet up DAILY in mosque but we lost it due to dunya’s activities eg our work which is act an excuses but also at the same time reality in Malaysia (boss might scold u etc etc). But if you can see in Makkah/Madinah, even the luxurious shop people stop doing what they do in order to pray. So i guess we totally lost it in terms of that. Even on weekend no one bother to go to mosque 5times and rather sleep at home when the christian go to church. ????
For urban (& youth) community events in KL I would definitely recommend checking out Peace Meal!
http://www.peacemeal.my/
For urban (& youth) Muslim community events in KL , I would definitely recommend checking out Peace Meal!
http://www.peacemeal.my
Dear Vivy,
That’s really deep. I can feel it since I’ve gone thru before marry my husband. He is Buddha convert to muslim but it takes time. For me its really huge decision, since I also not a perfect muslim. Keep learning to be a better muslim.
Salaam Vivy,
I feel you!!!
At times it’s upsetting because I’m unable to answer their questions as “complete’ as possible. SIGH !
1. http://hidayahcentre.org.my/
2. https://www.youtube.com/user/BayyinahInstitute
3. http://ikram.org.my/
Please do visit any one of these sites. Ada banyakje lagi, tapi cukupla tu dulu ek.
I truly sincerely hope you find what you’re searching for.
Hanis
019 711 03 22
It is sad in that in this country a Christian girl cannot marry a Muslim boy without converting to Islam. Just as how Islam is close to your heart, from the sound of it Christianity is close to hers. It is indeed a sad state of affairs when one has to leave the religion they love to marry someone they love.
Idk much about the muslim youth community in Malaysia. In my country, there are plenty of Muslim Youth communities and very much accessible to everyone. Its usually formed in universities, polytechnics, mosques and other private organisations. There is also a school built specially for youths to attend classes in English. Most of the classes are free. There is also a system in the school whereby u can choose whatever food u want and pay according to how much u can afford(sincerity) or choose not to pay at all. There is no price set for the foods and drinks. You can pay through money, smile or doa. The school has no strict system, those who have yet to don the hijab are still allowed to attend the classes. They are very welcoming. We can also borrow Islamic books without having the need to scan our name cards or anything. It is build on trust.
The youth communities in universities and private organizations usually attend for lectures and conduct community service activities to help the unfortunate. They have plenty of bonding sessions and fun activities too. They set-up iftar sessions for all races.
Hi Vivy,
Perhaps you can try the Being Me event. Do google for more info 🙂 I love this event soso much.
I grew up attending usrah under IKRAM. Hated it before but now I love it. We meet every week for 2 hours. Sometimes at our house, KLCC park, cafes or any new restaurant that we want to try. Start the session with reciting the Quran and discussing the meaning of it, then sirah nabi, world news and all… It was so much fun because we will bring food, cakes and all. Its a plus point that my usrah leader is a baker so she always prepares delicious cakes and pastries for us.
You can check out IKRAM, Usrah Fitrah or Young Muslims Project to name a few.
hi vivy.. when i started read this blog about it.. i realise that we as a muslim should have a good knowledge about our religion .. so we can teach and dakwah for all people .. i love what you has wrote it.. i hope u will have more story that u can share with other
In Singapore, we youths have a place called Alqudwah Academy.
Free classes for everyone, everyday except Monday in English. Some classes have to pay tho. There’s a cafe as well & we just pay for the food & drinks seikhlas hati.
Hi Vivy, I attend a girls haloqah once/twice a week, where we pray, recite Quran, and do kultum (where each of us would learn a topic once a week and present it to the team). We also have a haloqah leader/ mentor who guides us. I love it. We are close friends and love the catch up. And once a month (or whenever we remember lol) we have BBQ or go to the museum etc. They’re also a support group for me.
And yes please continue to support her 🙂 Shaykh Qadhi said one of the issues for new converts is not having enough support. I would also recommend Nouman Ali Khan’s video and a support group for converts – not sure if they have them there?
I feel you Vivy, that’s why I re learn Islam and sign up for weekend courses. It is amazing to rediscover Islam. Its all started with Ustz Nouman Ali khan n Mufti Menk. Love them. May Allah grant them good health to spread daawah.
It is particularly sad that she has to leave her religion to marry the man she loves. Pretty archaic laws we have in this country (amongst other things) where the middle ground is lost in so many scenarios. She seems to hold a deep and joyful connection to Christianity yet there’s no room for them to manage both as they go through married life (on official documents anyway). I pray that she is able to enjoy the love of her own religion and her adopted one as she moves on in life. I’m sure she appreciates the support!
Love this post Vy!
I felt I was reborn when I embraced Islam 4 years ago. So much more to know and to learn of course. May this post be an eye opener for baby Muslims and those born Muslim. Islam is the most beautiful religion, once you step into its, so many doors to Jannah opened.
❤️❤️❤️
hey, vivy. I copied the URL to this blog post and posted it on Twitter to make people think more about this as it made me think about it after I read this blog post. I hope you don’t mind. I’ll take it down ASAP if you do mind.
Hye vivy , for me personally the best way to learn about our religion is to learn about the Word of Allah which is the Holy quran. I recommend that you learn from bayyinah.tv . Trust me you will develop special relationships with quran like never before. Ustaz nouman ali khan will explain every ayat in detail and we will have better understanding in Allah’s word. okay. love you .
Assalamualaikum Vivy,
It is a good write-up.
I personally feel that is is our duty to help make reverted Muslims fall in love with Islam. Thank you and jazakAllahu khairan kathira for this opportunity for us to aide her in the journey.
1.
There are actually a lot of congregations for Muslims to gather weekly. It depends on the location. Sometimes we do not know of a congregation that is very close to us. Not only that, there is a pretty strong sisterhood amongst those who participate.
Do check out Keluarga Ribatul Quran on Facebook. They gather every Monday, Thursday and Saturdays. It feels like a huge family over there.
The teacher is a descendant of Rasulullah صَلَّى اللّٰهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّم. There are even non-Muslims who attend for a few months before accepting Islam.
2.
Maybe you can ask your friend to contact Aliza Kim, who is a reverted sister from Thailand 🙂 She is such a kind and gentle soul.
I am sure she would go the distance to help a fellow reverted sister. Especially considering that she knows the struggles of a reverted Muslim.
https://www.facebook.com/OfficialAlizaKim/
3.
On an international level, there are sites like Solace for Revert Sisters in Difficulty.
Their specific mission is to aide reverted sisters worldwide, in learning Islam and in other aspects of life as well. They have been helping many sisters for years.
Here is the website: http://www.solaceuk.org/
Here is the Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SOLACEforrevertsindifficulty/
4.
The popular websites include Bayyinah.tv and SeekersHub.org. Both are extremely helpful to learn the Deen and understand Al-Qur’an 🙂
These websites help even the born Muslims fall in love with Islam! Alhamdulillah 🙂
Dear vivy, i used to think that islam also is a very strict religion, so many rules, soooo scary jahannam, a very hard punishment for this and that.
But, I stumble across a video in youtube. The title is Allah is near by ustd. Nouman Ali Khan.
And I cried so hard, because for the first time I see islam through a different perspective. And the more I watch ustd. Nouman’s video, the more I fall in love with islam.
Maybe… you could watch the video too.
Salam vivy. There is a note-making class based on Quran by sister Ayesha Shahira. I never attended the class but i can see how much it can benefit muslims to understand Quran better and be closer to Quran in order to make it our companion. Usually it’s just a small gathering for each session. You might want to check it out 🙂
I’m actually happy that many responds to your post. Imagine how influential you can be for more positive causes! Go Vivy. 🙂 May Allah take care of you and beloved ones in dunya and akhirah.
Interesting insight!
believe the Koran is clear that there should be no compulsion in religion but in practice, it appears that it applies only to the benefit of muslims. The lady makes a good point. Why must the partner convert to Islam? I know that in the middle east, apostasy out of Islam is punishable with death but this is Malaysia. Perhaps she should consider keeping her religion. Muslim males can marry women who are ‘people of the book’ i.e. Jewish and Christian women. Prophet Muhammad had one Jewish wife who eventually converted to Islam and one coptic christian wife who did not. Though unusual, it is not an unheard of practice in the middle east.
Thanks for this entry. I read all the comments, and thanks for so many informations. I married to a christian convert muslim too, i’m not a religious woman, just a so-so town girl. And my husband has little knowledge about Islam.
My husband has soooooo many questions about Islam that I hardly to answer his questions, but thanks for all his questions, slowy I read quran back to find answer for his questions. And whenever I couldn’t find answer for him, I pray to Allah to help to give the answer.
And sometimes I cry a lot when read quran or during my sujud coz I feel so guilty I couldn’t guide my husband well.
It is hard to have mix marriage, I struggle a lot, and so my husband as well. thanks to Allah, he could pray now, but still in the process leàrning quran….one step at a time.
My husband asked me once, ‘do you know why Allah asks us to pray 5 times a day?’ … ‘do you pray with all your heart?’ …finding the answer is not hard, but to explain to him is quite difficult coz so many follow up questions after that..
I wish your beloved one will have a beautiful life with his girlfriend. And hope the girl convert to Islam with all her heart, not just because she wanted to marry her bf. And be patience to each other.
I have been following you for such a long time that I felt i knew who you were referring to; just wasn’t 100% certain. But judging from her most recent instagram post, confirm already ???? Hehe I promise I won’t say anything as well! Mums the worddddd ???? She’s soooo pretty though!
I think this is highly relatable. For a teenager like me and still exploring our identity, we all need that strong support structure. It’s such a shame to see most of us glorifying the idea of being a good Muslim when most of the time we don’t support each other and we doubt our exitence and relevance towards Allah. This is such a good post !!
Hi I,
Youre right that there is no compulsion into reverting to Islam. But with regards to Muslim men being allowed to marry people of the book , i’m afraid it’s not as straight cut as that, People of the book are indeed Christian and the Jewish, however this needs to go back to the very true meaning of who exactly are people of the book. The Book being referred to here is not simply the Bible that we have today or what is being practised by the Christians here. It’s highly arguable that the Book that is being referred to here could be the Old testament. I cant say for sure with Torah though. I’m no expert and thats just how much i know- that the Christians today are no longer considered as the People of the Book in the context referred to in the Koran. I suggest that you seek the experts’s further view on this. I’m married to a revert as well and im still learning together with my husband. Take care
http://www.msn.com/en-my/news/national/heirs-to-naza-and-berjaya-empire-announce-wedding-engagement/ar-BBDzLpE?li=BBr8Mk9
are you talking bout this couple Vivy?? just asking
wow
anyway,
I dont think there’s a problem in what we practiced everyday, because -what we have been preached from the Quran can already be apply throughout our lives /everyday. kalau nak bercommunity sangat pon , in the end. akan jadi berpuak2 lama2. thats what happened in the US. ur church, my church, and same with in the terengganu and kelantan. your mosque, my mosque. My preach is better than yours kinda thing. I believe what we do should be more leverage and equally distributed. not just muslim to muslim but muslim to non muslim aswell, atleast from my POV. btw,there’s no right and wrong at others opinion, so I understand why she was scared. but if she have the highest faith for Islam, there shall not be a problem just because she doesnt have a place to go every week. you know what Im saying? regardless what or who she is because Islam already given you what you should do on a regular basic. Its not a lifestyle for a week, but its for everyday.
maybe what Im trying to say, she being afraid is probably has something to do with her faith. but InshaAllah with great examples like you and Fadza, she might be inspired InshaAllah Amin. takut2 nak kahwin pon dengan lelaki melayu sosial. itu yang jadi xnampak ke mana arahnya then in the end… religion is all about weekly function.which is not for Islam. we strictly do not eat this and that and we dont do this and that. I pray that Allah guide her InshaAllah. shall you too help her with that 😉 macam you dulu pon banyak pergi ISLAMIC talk & conference kan? lebih faham lebih xtakut.. so Maybe we can help her from there. her faith and overcome her lack of knowledge of Islam.
Yana, I have to agree with you!!
Assalamualaikum. Hi Vivy. Sorry for the late response as the post has been written 2 months back.
Anyhow, you may want to check into this. Sorry this might be quite long but I don’t know where else should I send this to you. Might be beneficial for the readers here too.
The WISE Summer School is an initiative to introduce the intellectual-spiritual tradition of Islam, particularly with the aim of equipping seekers of knowledge of all educational backgrounds and professionals fields with the tools to acquire or re-acquire the worldview of Islam to engage with contemporary challenges. It is an intensive programme that articulates the true meaning of religion, knowledge, happiness, justice, man and education as understood by great Muslim luminaries, and in so-doing, strengthening the role of each individual in the Muslim Community.
The WISE Summer School will allow participants to learn, engage and benefit from scholars who have devoted many years of their life in acquiring the understanding of Worldview of Islam under the intellectual and moral guidance of Professor Dr. Syed Muhammad Naquib Al-Attas, founder of ISTAC, Distinguished Holder of Al-Ghazali Chair and currently the Distinguished Visiting Professor at CASIS (UTM), Kuala Lumpur.
The program will include visits to selected locations in addition of readings and discussions of key texts with a view toward working out its transformative, operational implications for personal, professional and public life.
Venue: Universiti Teknologi Malaysia (UTM), Kuala Lumpur Campus, Jalan Semarak, Malaysia
Teachers:
Prof. Dr. Syed Muhammad Naquib Al-Attas (To be confirmed)
Prof. Dr. Wan Mohd Nor Wan Daud
Prof. Dr. Muhammad Zainiy Uthman
Dr. Mohd Zaidi Ismail
Dr. Mohd Sani Badron
Dr. Mohd Farid Shahran
Dr. Adi Setia Md Dom
Dr. Wan Suhaimi Wan Abdullah
Mr. Roslan Jelani
Modules:
Module 1: The Worldview of Islam: A Brief Overview
Module 2: The Meaning of Religion and the Concept of Revelation
Module 3: The Nature of Man and the Meaning of Happiness
Module 4: The Cosmos as the Created Book
Module 5: The Concept of Knowledge
Module 6: Secularization and The External Crisis of the Muslims
Module 7: Internal Crisis of the Muslims : Corruption of Knowledge, The Loss of Adab and False Leadership
Module 8: Ta’dib as the Concept of Education in Islām
Organizers:
i. HAKIM–www.hakim.org.my
HAKIM stands for “Himpunan Keilmuan Muslim” (Malay for: Assembly of Intellectual Muslims). HAKIM’s programs and activities are directed at the long-term civilizational revivification of the Ummah in general and the Muslims of Malaysia in particular through well thought out, systematic educational, research and consultancy initiatives.
HAKIM believes that it is of the utmost intellectual and strategic importance for thinking Muslims to appropriate the proper use of the key-term Worldview of Islam and to articulate it in institutional and operational terms so it can serve as a practical guide to people involved in salient public domains of the civilizational enterprise, such as science and technology, politics, civil society, education, justice, economics and commerce.
ii. CASIS–www.utm.my/casis
CASIS stands for the Centre for Advanced Studies in Islam, Science and Civilisation. It is a faculty under the Innovation Centre in University Technology Malaysia (UTM), Kuala Lumpur. CASIS seeks to promote post-graduate scholarship and learning for the advancement of knowledge in the fields of study relating to Islam, Science, and Civilization and their allied sciences under the ambit of the worldview of Islam in full cognizance of relevant developments in other civilizations, especially in the contemporary world.
Among its main objectives is to train young scholars who are intellectually adept to delve into the intricacies of religious thought while simultaneously at home with (intellectual and) scientific ideas, technologies and socio-economic thought and institutions of today. These emerging scholars will have the requisite intellectual tools and competent knowledge to imbibe from the multi-disciplinary program to prepare themselves for future intellectual and civilizational challenges at home and the world at large.
Why would she need to give up her faith? Because she’s marrying a Muslim and that religion is deemed superior? What utter nonsense!
Hi Vivy,
It was very interesting to read this post. Especially because I’m a Christian and have been on the other side of the story. Personally, I have experienced that this is a very difficult situation. You can not and should not try to change the faith of the person you love. It is something very close to the heart and it affects all the choices one makes in life. I myself therefore broke up with my boyfriend, which until today is the most difficult decision I’ve ever made. However I trust that God cares more about him than I do and that God will show the way. I would suggest you to take a similar standpoint towards your friend and his girlfriend. Don’t force anything and let God take care of it.
Hai vivy, Watch Zakir Naik.. You will learn more.. Semua jawapan yang you tanya itu.. Ada di sana. It hurts when someone dont even know the answer untuk jawap the christian.. Apatah Lagi membaca dari blog idola saya. May allah bless you.
Vivy! Please Please Please Send this message to your colleague 😊 Please Watch vivy.. saya harap with this video, problems itu dapat di selasaikan..
https://youtu.be/cdj33GuY-h8
Alslamu alaykom vivy 🌸 , i just read your post and i wanted to recommend a very beautiful channel on youtube called “ fattabiouni” by alhabib mohammed alsaggaf … its a very beautiful channel … its in arabic but they have english subtitles … i really do recommend it … i feel like the videos are very near to the youth And also very valuable and it teaches us about our prophet’s ( peace be upon him) sunnahs in a very beautiful way … …may Allah guide us all and grant us all aljanah to be with our beloved prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم … ( peace be upon him )💚