my stanford experience
August 30, 2017“You shouldn’t be nervous, you should be excited!” my dad reminded me at the dinner table before my flight.
I had mixed feelings going to a graduate programme in Stanford University in Palo Alto, California. Paid a lot of money to enroll and was going to take in all that I can, but I still felt a little nervous. Leaving the kids left me with guilt but I’m pretty strong in that department. My issue was more on the actual course and flashbacks of shy undergraduate Vivy came to my present mind. What if those matsalehs speak better than me and I get embarrassed? What if they ask me to get up in front of hundreds of students to give a presentation? What if they realize this woman actually doesn’t know much and I tarnish Malaysia’s good name? And the golden question of all, what if they can’t see me because I’m so tiny? I mean, I’m already short in my own country. Now, imagine a country where people are double the height of that tall Malaysian friend of yours. Gosh, they’re going to literally pick me up and put me in their pocket, aren’t they?
I don’t want to change a lot of things in my life. But if I could, it would be how I lived my academic life in uni. I went to LSE, a great uni (best uni in the world, way better than that Imperial College place *looks at Fadza*), I graduated and flew back home. Did I study hard? Yeah I guess. Could I have maximized my potential there? Absolutely. I hung out with Malaysians, traveled with Malaysians, went to Malaysian restaurants with Malaysians…. I was intimated by the matsalehs because they’re bigger, smarter (arguable statement here), and sure knew how to milk the confidence. Have you ever been in a class where the teacher asked something and you were too shy to answer and some other person answered the exact thing you wanted to say? Like dude I thought it first, how dare you. Have you ever had that one matsaleh guy who was at the bar last night taking tequila shots and comes up to class the next morning saying all the right things to the professor with confidence? I used to look at them with envy. I totally blame (oklah partly blame…) our education system for the passive learning and never letting the students speak up to think and argue. I mean, we’re Asians – our culture itself is so ingrained in values of respect and humility. There we were back in school underlining things that our teacher asked us to, memorizing for exams and afraid to question our teachers, and there they were in the West being taught how to do public speaking and creative thinking. Don’t even get me started on our education system, I just hope a lot has changed since my days.
Anyway, years have passed since uni, 8 to be exact. I’ve matured, I’ve gained confidence, I’ve gained experience in business, I’ve grown a bit taller (no I haven’t but let’s just say I have), I’ve evolved as an adult. Sure, I could read the news a bit more than I should, but hey I think I could stand up and give opinions without doubting myself anymore. And I did just that at Stanford. And guess what, no one judged anyone. Everyone had valid opinions in class, everyone respected each other no matter where you came from, and it was such an awesome experience. I talked to the professors, I talked to other students, I was really into it and so were they.
Stanford was a one-week intensive course about innovation and growth, hosted by Endeavor which is the network of mentorship that Fadza and I were selected to be in, among 11 companies in Malaysia. We learned so many things; from challenges businesses go through while scaling, how to make decisions, how to empower and incentivize your team, how to evaluate partnerships, how to expand, how to do design thinking and brainstorm, so many useful things. None of the classes gave conclusions at the end, they just gave case studies and it was up to the individuals how they want to decide on their own real-life decisions. What was amazing about this course was that they gave such credible lecturers and speakers. Each of the professor that taught us were millionaires who had done startups before or are investors or both. So when they spoke, you really wanted to listen because they knew what they were talking about. The guest speakers were also amazing; a guy whose invested into Uber and many other high profile businesses, a guy who turned down the offer to invest into Google when they started and why he (wrongly) didn’t see potential, and so many more. Even the students were remarkable. There were about 60 people from all over the world at different levels in their business (some just started and some were at $100m annual revenue) and 7 girls only (me included)!
One of my favorite sessions was one that talked about failure. It was on the last day and I thought it was such a nice wrap up to the course. Because everyone looks at successes and the glorious shiny companies, but no one really pays attention to the ones that failed. The guest speaker was the former CTO of NASA who felt he was ready to do his own thing, he was very credible and had all the good billionaires investing in him. And the business failed. We were given the scenario of the company by the entrepreneur himself, and for 20 minutes we all had to predict why the company failed. One said “failed leadership and hubris” and I was like woahhh the guy is sitting right there! *knife in heart* But they were all so cool, these Americans. They just took it in and shrugged. Anyway, while we were doing that, we didn’t realize it but we were picking up tips on what we shouldn’t do in our own businesses. I might write a blogpost on this alone because we can all learn from it, just need to find the time.
We had loads of smaller group brainstorming sessions and study groups at night after dinner (I know right?! Hardcore these Stanford people, I mean I just wanted to eat maggi at that hour….). We were given tasks, we had to built prototypes to solve problems (it was hilarious – I put two playdoh tubs on a ruler haha I swear there was a reason to it), we even had a real-life play of a pitching session where the VC told us exactly what he thought while the company was pitching to him. My fav was the half-day business challenge where we presented our business challenges to each other to solve. It was really nice bouncing off ideas and challenges with strangers, but strangers who could contribute because they know how it feels or they have been there before. When people have never heard of you, they give unbiased opinions and could potentially point out something you’ve never realized in your business. I had a few of those moments during these sessions and it was just mindblowing.
Ah and the room! We each had our own room with ensuite bathroom and a sharing pantry. It was super clean, I loved it! And we had a TV each too. #2brokegirlsmarathon! Fadza and I had own rooms but of course being the clingy couple we were, we snuggled up at night together.
Scuse the mess, ladies and gentlemen. I was packing to go home and wanted to quickly snap before the Fadza leaves me with the Uber.
As good as that course was, I’m now on the plane back to Malaysia and boy does it feel good. Had loads of fun there learning and networking, but nothing beats the feeling of coming home and hearing “To all Malaysians, welcome home” on the flight. I’ve gained an abundance of wealth in knowledge but I’ve also gained realization that I will never be able to live in San Francisco. They have dinner at 6pm, everything closes by 9ish, and you get hungry at 10 (because you had dinner – most probably a salad – 4 hours ago!!) walking aimlessly looking for a vending machine…. that only sells organic water. Ok la fine, I exaggerate but really, they eat so healthily (would you like a salad or a salad?) and they bike everywhere. Sounds good if you’re outdoorsy and like to live life on two wheels.
This little girl from Malaysia can’t even climb on them. #bicyclesmadeforgiants
Good to be home, Malaysia. Just in time for Merdeka!
Bacaan pagi yang sangat baik untuk saya yang sedang bercuti, even i m not in yor field vivy, but i stalk u everyday. Love yor caption, lov yor style, lov yor pic.
Such a great experience Vivy!
You are so lucky. Hope that knowledge can be share and encourage a lot of us.
I’m totally agreed with your statement about out education system in Malaysia..We should really improvise and take examples from well developed country..
Hi Vivy, thank you for sharing your experience. I have a question, did you face any discrimination when you were in the US (this trip or previous) for being a Muslim/ wearing a hijab. I’m sure you didn’t in Stanford but on a day to day basis walking down the street/ at airport immigration.
I was stopped at immigration and detained for a few hours the last time I was there (this was pre Trump era but during the election trail) so I’m curious to see how things have changed with the new administration and how you handled it (if you did encounter any).
Thanks for sharing your experience again!
Totally agree on our education system (Brunei is the same). We grew up like that also and was the same when we went overseas for studies; usually just stayed within our own tribe. Feel the same way – if I could change, it would be feel less intimidated by others.
That has certainly been an incredible journey, Vivy! thank you for taking the time to blog about this!! I felt so proud seeing all the photos above, and wow you did a great job!! (I’m so proud of you, being among the 7 super ladies, and being the Muslimah icon out there 🙂 Well done!! 🙂
Sorry to interrupt but I dont agree on blaming the education system.. sometimes the government did everything including encourage creative thinking n evaluate other things on students such as – project, group activities etc.. for me it depends on individual on how to take or overcome everything in their life.. btw.. good sharing n I lov to read your posting
That’s an amazing experience you’ve gained there! I love Design Thinking – it totally erases all the barriers that we’ve built when it comes to creating the right services/ solutions for consumers through conventional processes that we inherit from the past; and you get to force yourself to think from the perspective of the consumers’ most natural behaviour.
And your comment on the local education system is on-point too. This is another bigger conversation that needs to be pondered upon if we want to see our children compete beyond just being ‘jaguh kampung’.
owh I miss SF salads 🙂
Hi, Vivy! You have never failed to trigger my inner thought of being ambitious beyond a traditional way of thinking. Glad you are back!!
I really wanted to learn more about that prototype thingy.. will wait for another post 🙂
I love how encouraging this post is and the comments above, and I don’t mean to sound like a bimbo but I can’t help but to notice… How come there’s another Black Birkin over there V?! Thought you just had Ally! Haha. On serious note, you’re such an inspiration! So much respect!
Our education system isn’t that bad, you know..besides looking at the stats mentioning Malaysia as the second largest country in the world sending students to the UK.
I think, most problems with the kids nowadays stem from home. For me, in the end, it all boils down to the parents. Parents play very important roles and based on my observations, if the parents are successful, most of their children would be successful too.
For the confidence thingy, I disagree. It’s fine to look up to the Americans for their confidence/boldness whatsoever, but sometimes we should take pride of our Asian values and utilise them at the best.
Looking forward to read the “failure” entry
Can’t wait to hear about why that NASA guy failed on his billion dollar startup!!!
gosh, u r so good with words vi. i really am adoring ur writing. muah idola
Thank you for sharing with us your experiences there!! Can’t wait for the next blog post on that NASA guy.. and yes, I totally agree on the education system point.😅 Even with the introduction of KBAT and all, we are still far in terms of application and enforcement..at the end of the day, it still falls back to the exam result😑
About the education system, I know right! I’m lucky enough to enroll at a college where our lecturers are mostly mat sallehs so they were also open minded like those Americans! I hope the Malaysia learning environment will become more positive and encouraging for all students
you go girl !! such an inspiration <3
Wow Vivy, you sure are an Inspiration (with a capital I) to many, me included 🙂 But I kinda disagree with your opinion on asian / Mat Salleh students. I’m from SG and I must say our edu system is definitely not just about classroom-based learning. As a student (from a public / government school no less), I was exposed to public speaking / critical thinking / debate from as early as primary school. Every morning my teachers used to start off the day by discussing about current issues and we will take turns to give our opinions. And I dare say, Asian kids trumps these Mat Sallehs when it comes to Maths! A look at the Uni rankings I see Imperial College at No. 9 and NUS / NTU at No. 12 and 13 respectively -that is something to be proud of! I’m not sure about MY’s edu system but I am pretty sure its not that bad, afterall, it produced students like you *winks*
I dont know why you have to use the word matsaleh.Trying to relate with the readers? trying to be funny? maybe. Its just simply unnecessary. Anyway, I second your take abt Malaysia education system. In the end, you can get straight A, tp bila pg luar negara utk belajar. baru tau tekezut kena tanya. like hey, whats your opinion on this. ohh I dont know.haha kalau our V, a straight As student and took an A level, went to two different schools.. one asrama penuh, one swasta.So if you said that we are lacking. I guess its somewhat true.
disclaimer:pretty sure the government hav done tremendous effort so that we could exceed the expectations. I still prefer our edu system than the rest of the Asia. I like the none-restricted dont care/ up to you system. Simply because the pressure is off for one’s who just dont care
agree with Nabila dan SNM… dont blame our education system for things that have failed you… I thought you were in private/international school before? I’m from Sekolah kebangsaan from darjah 1 till tingkatan 5, alhamdulillah turned out well and complete the highest degree one could achieved…. it’s just that from my observation, some of this mat saleh, sometimes just throw out ideas so that they can talk (kadang takde isi pun cakap mereka.. not all.. some).. but we are more reserved in that matter.. why kita reserve? sbb our culture… asian culture.. sometimes, we tend to think first whether things that we want to say or give idea will hurt others feeling or not? this is a good teaching in our culture… budaya membentuk bangsa, we should be proud of that…. or sometimes we tried to put words in our head to come out with good sentences (that’s me la sbb I tak terer english.. so dalam kepala buat ayat melayu utk translate to english)…makanya, lambat lah sikit respon kepada isu yang ditanya.. tp saya bangga dengan semua ini. Sebab saya org Malaysia, boleh cakap dua2 bahasa- cuma BM lebih dominan..rasa nya tiada masalah untuk ini.
plus one more thing, org kita suka sangat gelak bila org bangsa kita bertutur dalam BI yang tak betul… bahasa kita ialah bahasa melayu.. pernah dengar org arab, orang eropah, orang jepun atau korea atau thailand atau vietnam bercakap bahasa inggeris? sempurna ke? tidak bukan.. adakah mereka diketawakan atau dijadikan bahan lawak? hmmmmm.. something to ponder… sesuatu utk difikirkan kita bersama…
Harapan agar komen ini dibaca oleh semua dengan hati terbuka. Komen ini bukan hentaman.. tetapi lebih kepada sesuatu yang dapat kita fikirkan bersama.. think positive guys.. 🙂
Good sharing Vivy. Love the articles and love your attitude. Go werk it girl !
Thank you for sharing this, hope you can share some more posts from the course . And yeah totally agree about the Asian passive learning lol.
Oh my god! I’m obsessed with your blog now!💕💕💕
Vivy! I cannot agree with you more about the Malaysian education system. Being raised there and having attended public schools in KL, I moved to the States 10+ years ago to go to college and my confidence dropped because of the way the Americans presented themselves. Now, being here after 10 years I have learned to adapt and evolve, but needless to say, it wasn’t the easiest process. I talked about this specific topic in my graduate school application essay; about how we weren’t encouraged to ask questions. Some teachers would say, “It is the way it is” which is so stark in comparison to professors here who would TAKE all the TIME in the world to make sure the student understands something. — At the end of the day, i think us Malaysians are just too hard on ourselves, not because there’s no self-love, but because there are too many judging eyes & lips in our society. — Kudos to you for stepping out of your comfort zone and presenting yourself that way.. I bet that felt AMAZING!
xoxo Your fellow ex-SKBDian Aza =P (Congrats on ur thriving biz too dahling!)
Salam sis,
It was really inspiring reading your experience, and fun too!
I will be looking forward to seeing the post on the tips you wish to share with us. About the education system and children being outspoken, I wish i could speak from Malaysian perspective but I can’t because I’m a nigerian. However I could totally relate with your line of though. Only people who didn’t have enough to go to school where these social and personal development skills are nurtured would get this. I guess you get what you can afford, right.
I wish you all the best dear.
So glad that I read this! I’m currently experiencing the same thing you’ve mentioned, how you didn’t have the confidence in the uni because of the way the Westeners carry themselves. I’m doing A-Levels right now, and oh god, those people who had been in a different education system than me (well I’ve been to public schools since little), they’re so outspoken and confident! They’re Malaysians who did IGCSE btw. I do have my share of thoughts during classes but I just couldn’t voice them out confidently, afraid of being judged (what a problem, right ugh). And some part of me blame the education system, I just realised how important it is to shape you into who you’re now. I really hope they’re gonna change it, for a definitely better future. And currently I’m waiting for offers from uni, which includes LSE, hoping that I can go to any of the unis and improve myself even more. I’m so inspired by this post and I hope it will last me long (lol).
p/s : Didn’t know you’re a fan of 2 broke girls cause I love that series too !!! Love you Vivy !
i am officially obsessed w ur blog!! i enjoyed ur writing. it is easy for me to read and actually i hope u can teach us *youngsters how to write in english properly (all those grammar thigy)